Living somewhere in between.

Dear L'Oreal,

Thank you for producing a reasonable substitute for Givenchy's $30 Phenomen'eyes mascara. My Midwestern sensibilities would not allow me to purchase it, but now for $6, I don't have to.

Dear Rusk,

Thank you for your wonderful Wired styling creme that gives my fine, limp hair body and texture without looking dirty or greasy without the pricetag that comes with Kerastase products. Which are made by L'Oreal anyway. What a rip.

Dear leggings and skinny jeans,

Thank you for making my legs look so great in my boots. And for making my inner thighs feel slimmer than I know for a fact they are.

Dear Smashbox,

Thank you for your silicone primer. Without it, my foundation would look like crackle paint.

Dear NARS,

Thank you for your Angelika blush, which makes me look flushed and not like I have an acute case of rosacea.

Dear Harmons,

Thank you for your fudge brownies, which I cannot replicate, but doubled with an ice cold Coca-Cola classic, allow me to survive days like today where my children might otherwise kill me.

Dear LJ pals,

Thank you, as always, for sharing yourself with me even when I fail to reciprocate. You're all a valuable part of my life and I enjoy so much growing with you.

You know what? Sometimes, you just have to go with it and see where you end up.

When my children don't nap at the same time, I want to chuck sharp, dangerous things in my neighbors yards so that we can all experience this misery. FIFTEEN BLESSED MOTHER MINUTES, that's it! That's all I ask! But nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Greyson does not know how to communicate his displeasure in an inside voice, and god help me, I have even tried the inside/outside voice thing, the thing that all childless people roll their eyes at when they hear it from other parents or on TV, thinking to themselves, "Oh my god, they're children, not idiots!"

It's not that I don't love my kids and believe that they're the smartest people ever to exist on the planet, but ...


Anyway,  his shrieking always wakes Ethan up, so this has not been a relaxing and enjoyable Sunday. I wanted to take them out to one of the many fall activities available in the valley, but alas it is Utah and all places of business spontaneously break into ebola at the idea of being open and available on Sunday. I wish I were exaggerating, but even some restaurants are closed on Sundays. Old freakin' Navy doesn't open until NOON. The mind, it boggles. So instead, Warren is napping, Ethan is napping, Greyson is watching Spongebob and I'm writing this, basically killing time until I start the lasagne. Not quite as fancy as the Daring Baker's lasagne, but still a pretty time-consuming one.  I made it before, would you like to see it?

Delicious.

Have I mentioned that I love pie? I love pie. Eventually I'll pop the recipe in all it's glory over to kitchenista - because I know you were all on tenterhooks waiting for it (p.s, what are tenterhooks?) - but I needed to share the AMAZING failure I experienced this time around:



It's so beautiful. So beautiful I could just gnaw off my arm in bitter disappointment. WHY CAN I NOT MAKE A GODDAMN PIE CRUST?!

It began with a wail,
and a wag of a tail...
No no, that last part is a lie
No dogs were allowed inside
the birthing room.

 But anyway, on with the story
sans the details (how gory!),
and baby girl arrived to the scene
squalling, wrinkled and mean,
so sayeth the father.

It progressed the usual way,
eating and sleeping, day after day
with princesses and ponies galore
then dirt, boys and the outdoors
became the norm.

When high school came to torment all,
more drama than expected came to call,
upon this family, or more specifically,
upon the mother, and then so brutally,
took her away.

Though 8 years passed, it started then
and later, surprise peeked in
when life began changing, brother got hitched
daughter moved to Utah. Quick, she needs pinched!
Utah? This must surely not be right.

But it is, indeed and she is me,
I now live here with my own family.
We number four, the four of us
and family life is as glorious
as it ever can be.

And with that, hello! I'm Ali, or Alicia. I answer to nearly anything, really.  I thoroughly enjoy writing bad poetry, overly wordy prose, have a deep and abiding love affair with adjectives and it's lucky for the world that my passion is photography instead of writing. I'm just going to skim the surface here so that I don't repeat myself too much during the challenges, so I will tell you I'm 27 years old, my husband is 15 years older than me and we met on the internet 8 years ago, moved in together 7 years ago and got married 1.5 years ago. I've got two boys, Greyson and Ethan, 3 years old and 6 months old, respectively. I'm a stay-at-home mother trying to build a photography business on the side, and I am frequently awash in my own mediocrity. I am a decent cook and a terrible housewife, and thankfully neither of those things define me.  I'm an average kind of person - most traits applied to me start out with sorta, kinda, pretty - so you could say I'm sorta funny, kinda smart, pretty nice, but I will say I believe one of my more defining characteristics is that I genuinely care. I want you to succeed in whatever you want to do with your life. Though also, I want another piece of pie. Mmm. Pie.

I'm going to do LJ Idol again this year, with the desperate hope that it will remind me that I used to be able to construct conversation with more than 140 characters. I'm excited to participate along with some other pals, like adpaz  and cobycaroline !

I'm a tweeter, so feel free to tweet with me. http://twitter.com/a_n_woodward

If you were looking to play with a dSLR but didn't want to drop $1k for it and the lenses, have I got something for you.


http://sellout.woot.com/ will take you to a Pentax K100D 6.1MP Digital SLR Body for $239.99. It's a refurb but hard to beat that price. You can head over to http://www.adorama.com/TM2880PXAF.html and pick up a smartly ranged, pretty fast 28-80mm/3.5-5.6f lens for that body for $70. (I use the Tamron 28-75mm

That's right. You can have a DSLR for a little over $300. Merry Christmas!

Man, have I got nothin'. A boatload of pictures I've posted elsewhere but should post here as well, and that's it. No great stories to share, no real drama or difficulty in my life. One one hand it's great, on the other it makes for poor journaling.

We did have our ultrasound last week. It's another boy! Everything looks great.


Unfortunately, that's it. That's all I've got. I'll go through and post up some photos later.

If you are on my friends list, I want to know 36 things about you.
I don't care if we never talk, or if we already know everything about each other.
Short and sweet is fine... you're on my list, so I want to know you better!

Comment here (with your answers) and repost a blank one on your own journal.

01) Are you currently in a serious relationship?
02) What was your dream growing up?
03) What talent do you wish you had?
04) If I bought you a drink what would it be?
05) Favorite vegetable?
06) What was the last book you read?
07) What zodiac sign are you?
08) Any Tattoos and/or Piercings? Explain where.
09) Worst Habit?
10) If you saw me walking down the street would you offer me a ride?
11) What is your favorite sport?
12) Do you have a Pessimistic or Optimistic attitude?
13) What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?
14) Worst thing to ever happen to you?
15) Tell me one weird fact about you.
16) Do you have any pets?
17) What if I showed up at your house unexpectedly?
18) What was your first impression of me?
19) Do you think clowns are cute or scary?
20) If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
21) Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?
22) What color eyes do you have?
23) Ever been arrested?
24) Bottle or can soda?
25) If you won $10,000 today, what would you do with it?
26) Favorite band to listen to when you're mad?
27) What's your favorite place to hang out at?
28) Do you believe in ghosts?
29) Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
30) Do you swear a lot?
31) Biggest pet peeve?
32) In one word, how would you describe yourself?
33) Do you believe/appreciate romance?
34) Favourite and least favourite food?
35) Do you believe in God?
36) Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you?

I know that I have people of all political beliefs on my LJ, and while I don't particularly enjoy starting fights with my friends I absolutely have to vent or I will explode.


There are a handful of people on my Facebook friends who are Republican, and I generally don't have a problem with that because it so rarely affects our everyday lives. The fact that J is Mormon has little bearing on our conversations, so on and so forth. But I seriously cannot cope with the daily posts that say less about who he is and more about what he is being indoctrinated with.

These are the things I keep hearing: capitalism is dying. socialism is upon us. U.S.S.A! Obama will destroy the world, let doctors suck out your babies brains! Redistributing the wealth!

If these were accurate assessments, it would be fine. I would roll my eyes and move on. But they are just. plain. WRONG.

First, Obama is changing the numbers on our current tax plan, yes. OUR CURRENT TAX PLAN IS PROGRESSIVE; PROGRESSIVE TAX = REDISTRIBUTING WEALTH. If that is the basis on which someone is claiming we're becoming a socialist nation, newsflash: we already are one and have been since what, the New Deal? The wealthy currently pay the most in taxes, I believe. Under Obama, the wealthy will still pay the most in taxes. Amazing.

Second, the progressive tax system is but one way we're already "socialist" - states require companies to have certain measures in place for the health, safety and wellbeing of their employees, one of those things being minimum wage. In addition to that, major corporations and industries who sell publically traded stocks: individuals own a percentage of that company = state socialism. Am I wrong?

The only way one could argue with even the tiniest shred of accuracy would be Obama's health plan, and I don't care who you are, if you oppose getting health insurance for everyone I do not understand who you are and why we are friends. Harsh, maybe, but no one should be uninsured, period, end of story.


I think that's mostly it. If you don't want to hear me talk about this shit, I'll happily make a filter to prevent your exposure, just let me know.

So, this past weekend I was in Anaheim, CA for Blizzcon, and it was awesome and fun and I pretty much spent most of my time absorbing the awesome that is ronteflon, who I met for the first time after 7 or 8 or something ridiculous years of friendship. He is exceptional, btw, and I pretty much adore him for life. There was also the awesome of atlasimpure (Conor), moonshadowtiger (Jen), trolan (Kelly), mibecky (Becky), a handful of others not on LJ and of course, thebitingfaery (Steph).

Though the majority of the weekend was tied up in Blizzcon itself and the evenings of drunken (but not me!) carousing - and I have great documentation of those to be posted later - Sunday was mellow. Steph and Conor graciously escorted the four of us who were staying in the same suite - Ron, Kelly, my bff Debi and myself - to Huntington Beach, and while there I begged Steph to allow me to use her as a portrait subject. As most of you know, this is what I would like to do with my life, but my husband hates having his photo taken and there are only so many pictures of my son I can use in a portfolio. She agreed and so I came away with a batch of photos that I love and that she hates. That's my life, folks.

The great thing about Steph is that it is no work to find the best angle because they're all great. She's got great symmetry to her face, her bone structure is solid and her skin is flawless. The light and the lens just love her. No doubt that I'm an amateur but I really do think that the vast majority of these are solid work, if uninspired.

So, under the cut are my favorites and the link to the rest.

( Say cheese. )

AMG! 1) What states have I lived in? Kentucky, Georgia, Utah Missouri, Indiana, Utah Indiana, Texas, Utah Arkansas, Kentucky, Indiana

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I was talking this over with Warren this morning, because there is a lot in the world that I don't understand and he usually has a great take on it and is able to explain it in a way I get. This time, however, I think something fundamental is eluding me.

So apparently, when the Dow dropped and the bailout failed to pass, the stock market lost 1.87 trillion dollars (or something similar). What I'm failing to understand is that if no one actually sold any stock - if whoever held it before still holds it, it seems to me the loss is theoretical and if the economy rebounds there was actually no physical loss of cash at all. Warren tells me that it is no more theoretical than waving a $20 bill and saying it's worth $20, that even though it's just a piece of paper it has a value, and if the value drops it's a loss of money.  So, OK, say the value of a dollar drops to .50. So if I had $20, and the dollar value was halfed, my $20 would only be worth $10 and I would have a loss of $10.  If I maintained that $20, didn't spend it or use it in any way, when the dollar rebounds I would again have $20 and not have lost any money at all because I didn't spend it when the value was low. Does that make sense? 

So if the possessors of the stock that lowered don't sell it off while the value is low, theoretically they have no loss, right? What am I not getting?


It is becoming increasingly aware to me that a.) I am not as smart as I think I am, and b.) I have no grasp of abstract.

VoicePost 948K 4:51

(no transcription available)

(the voice post is critical to understanding this entry.)

What do you call a:
1. A body of water, smaller than a river, contained within relatively narrow banks.
2. What the thing you push around the grocery store is called.
3. A metal container to carry a meal in.
4. The thing that you cook bacon and eggs in.
5. The piece of furniture that seats three people.
6. The device on the outside of the house that carries rain off the roof.
7. The covered area outside a house where people sit in the evening.
8. Carbonated, sweetened, non-alcoholic beverages.
9. A flat, round breakfast food served with syrup.
10. A long sandwich designed to be a whole meal in itself.
11. The piece of clothing worn by men at the beach.
12. Shoes worn for sports.
13. Putting a room in order.
14. A flying insect that glows in the dark.
15. The little insect that curls up into a ball.
16. The childrens' playground equipment where one kid sits on one side and goes up while the other sits on the other side and goes down.
17. How do you eat your pizza?
18. What's it called when private citizens put up signs and sell their used stuff?
19. What's the evening meal?
20. The thing under a house where the furnace and perhaps a rec room are?
21. What do you call the thing that you can get water out of to drink in public places?

desertwolf  linked to this color IQ test

which gave me these results:

• Your score: 0
• Gender: Female
• Age range: 20-29
• Best score for your gender and age range: 0
• Highest score for your gender and age range: 1410

Note the date, please! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D! It's so neat the watch the little heartbeat flicker on the screen. The thingy says the new one should pop out about May 7th next year. I'M SO EXCITED! And so tiiiiiiiiiiiired. But at least no morning sickness this time around.

I am not in love with Picasa's way of linking to things, I was just too lazy to resize and pop them up on my own server (even the fullsize jpgs are huge in both resolution and size) so Picasa it was.

Sunday Warren gave in to my demands and took me up a canyon. I was pretty open as long as it wasn't Emigration, and I would prefer not Little Cottonwood (which is where Snowbird and Alta, two of our bigger ski resorts) because I've been up it a few times. I wanted to go somewhere new. Originally we were going to Timpanogas Cave in Utah County but it has a pretty steep hike, it's a long drive and it was already late. So, he took me up Big Cottonwood canyon to Brighton, which is the favorite ski resort of Utah locals.

Generally speaking there are two resorts up each canyon, the exception being Parley's, which leads to Deer Valley, Park City and The Canyons resorts. That seems different though because they aren't actually IN Parley's (which is I-80, write that down). I also realize belated that that's not exactly accurate, since I don't think there are any other resorts on the Wasatch Front outside of Parley's, Little and Big Cottonwood canyons. Hello, I am dumb. But anyway.

So we went up to Brighton, and to Silver Lake. It's a short, mild hike around the lake, .8 miles. Not quite as high up as Hidden Peak at Snowbird, which iirc is 11,000 ft, it still has an elevation of about 8,500 ft. So, no stunning views of the valley, but some beautiful alpine meadows, marshland and of course, the lake. There are even some bonus photos of Warren looking pleased by life as per usual and Greyson and his goofy grin.

The last two photos that look like a waterfall are actually the watershed, which is our primary source of water. Snow melting off the mountains runs off into the river, flows into the treatment center and into our pipes. Our tap water is surprisingly delicious.

Anyway, here are the pictures. If you don't want the sit through the stupid slideshow, I think you can just click to go to the album or something.



Now to process the 150 pics I took of G last night...

[12:30] Hey hey hey!
[12:30] I demand that you do not call her Sarah Palin.
[12:31] I have been calling her Geraldine Quayle Agnew, and I hope all of you will helpt to make it a meme.


Pass it on!